Now that I've horrified my readers with tales of road rage, let's tone it down a bit and talk about what is truly important in this world: the new accomplishments of my 8-month-old daughter.
In the last week, Katy Rose has demonstrated three new skills. If it were left up to me, I would replace the top stories on the evening news with announcements and video footage of Katy's new skills. I am fairly certain there wouldn't be too much opposition from the public... it seems like the only stories at the top of the broadcast are about crime or victims of accidents or other tragic events. I tend to favor abc15 news, so I'll just imagine co-anchor Katie Raml reading the news...
"Good evening, everyone. Our top story tonight is about the wonder of laughter. Those of you that have been following the growth of adorable Katy Rose will be happy to know that Katy has just recently learned to laugh out loud. According to her aunt and uncle, Katy is actually ticklish around the chubby crease in her inner thighs. This discovery was made on November 16 while babysitting Katy on her mommy's birthday, and they said she was 'laughing her little head off!' According to her mommy, Wendy, the tickle rumor is true, although Wendy says she always smiles but doesn't laugh every time. Each day the joke of the day is different, from blowing zerberts on Katy's belly to playing Peek-a-boo, and the only consistent laugh-getter so far is Katy's own mirror image. Wendy says now that Katy's laughing, she helps her exercise her funny bone every day."
Then the other co-anchor, Steve Irvin, says...
"Now, we check in on a developing story we brought you just a few days ago... Katy Rose started playing with a new activity center that Wendy's coworker gave her. It's a Fisher-Price Intellitainer. Apparently this toy is not a walker or Exersaucer, but with some elements of both, it is full of fun moving parts that make noise, light up, or play songs. Well, as of last night, mom Wendy reported exclusively to abc15 reporter Lori Jane Gliha about a new milestone in Katy's development. Lori Jane?"
"Thanks Steve. Here we are in the cozy condo of Wendy and her family. As you can see, the Intellitainer has a seat that swivels around and also slides back and forth on this little track. Well, last night, having put Katy on the floor to play with her toys, Wendy looked up to find Katy Rose standing up at her new Intellitainer. It appears that Katy Rose managed to get close to the edge of the track here, and pulled herself up to a standing position. Now, as Wendy told me, I understand that this is the very first time Katy Rose has done this all on her own. So you can see, Steve, that this is quite a big deal in this household. Reporting live, Lori Jane Gliha for abc15 news."
Katie Raml continues...
"And we have some breaking news to bring you now, also about Katy Rose. We've just gotten word into the newsroom that Katy has officially started crawling just this afternoon. Prior to today, Katy has been trying to crawl by rocking back and forth on all fours and practicing a pose her mom Wendy describes as the yoga pose, 'downward facing dog.' Wendy says Katy had occasionally made forward progress with one or both knees, but had not figured out how to move her arms forward, resulting in Katy falling forward. Ultimately, she usually resorted to rolling to get where she was trying to go. Today, Katy Rose crawled forward on several separate occasions, the first one as a mission to reach her mommy's painted toes. Mom Wendy is very excited, and we're pleased to be the first station to bring you this development."
Well, that was fun. I may not be the professional comedian that Katy is looking for just yet, but I'm working on it. In the meantime, I am perfectly content to watch and listen to her babble as she makes new discoveries, or see her chomp on anything within reach to practice using her one tooth. She can even take steps while I hold her hands, and she absolutely loves to dance. We had great fun cheering on the Bulldogs today. I can't wait to see what will be funny tomorrow.
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